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Posts Tagged ‘domestic violence’

Pierre-Joseph Proudhon (Courbet)

There is one disturbing side to the fight of some women denying parental alienation syndrome. The rights to be protected against domestic violence and to protect their kids from child abuse are theirs. They consider it as their property, and as Proudhon would say in “Qu’est -ce que la propriété? (What Is Property?), property is more the right to exclude someone else from the enjoyment of a good than that to derive enjoyment from it. The women rights movement, which succeeded in making domestic violence and child abuse against the law, has fought for them and them only. Those fathers and mothers who claim the rights to be protected against parental alienation are just bums and usurpers that have to remain disenfranchised. Domestic violence is about a man beating up his wife and his kids, end of the story. The work of Gardner and others is phony and their authors’ agenda is to help fathers abusing their kids with legal protection.

For these women too, family courts have been converted  to the parental alienation syndrome doctrine and are massively granting fathers custody of their kids (I guess, lucky me, I have missed Manhattan family court’s conversion). Hence mothers filing for divorce need to be coached to face the courts’ new biased scrutiny. That’s what RightsforMothers.com is doing in a recent posting, and its advice to mothers is quite telling. Among others: don’t refer to your children as “my” children;  don’t badmouth the father of your kids; keep pictures of your children with their dad; allow contacts between your kid and your ex’s extended family… In other terms, don’t alienate your children from your ex. That’s a start.

How great the world would be if these folks were to understand that mothers’ rights shall not be exclusive of fathers’ rights and the other way around!

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patental alienationJustice is all about getting fast and demonstrable results. Take domestic violence and child abuse: for sure, they  cause severe harm to children that should be taken seriously. But most importantly, these crimes have  seemingly  easily identifiable culprits. With one complaint, the bastard gets an order of protection against him and  as a result, that boosts crime prevention statistics. Sometimes, the crusade itself might create the criminal. I was reading last night the nauseous but brilliant piece of Mark Bowden in the December issue of Vanity Fair. Detective Michelle Deery, posing as the mother of two girls, entrapped a man to write that he wants to have sex with the two girls. Bowden goes through their  emails and shows how the predator -the cop- gets what she wants from her prey, the fellow with the deprived libido. He wants to have sex with her but he is not interested in her girls. Every time he tries to set up a rendez-vous with her only, she pulls out. He gets it.  He indulges into saying what she seems to want : having sex with her and the girls; in any case, having sex with the girls. Nobody knows how the guy would have behaved with the girls had Deery been the nuts she pretended to be, but why care with such hair splitting? Predator caught. Deery should create a own show and compete with voyeur and sick Chris Hansen’s NBC show, “To Catch a Predator.

On the other hand however,  one wonders what it takes to have parental alienation acknowledged by the justice system. It leaves deep and perhaps indelible damage to children, years after the facts. Hence the justice system gets it just right: nothing urgent. To give credence to the charge of parental alienation in court, a group of 50 experts of 10 countries are pushing to have parental alienation registered as a syndrome in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Laudable efforts. The turning point in the recognition of parental alienation syndrome by the justice system might be a Jerry Springer show featuring a dad reunited with his alienated children.

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The Closer (Kira Sedgwick)

The Closer (Kira Sedgwick)

I happened to watch “The Closer” (Kyra Sedgwick) tonight. The first episode of season 5, whose title I could not find. Frankly, at the beginning, I was scared that the show would  sunk in one of the worst cliche ever. Brenda and her squad discovered that an entire latino  family has been murdered: the mother, the two kids and la suegra. “Usual” suspect: the husband, Rivera.  Rivera has been charged with domestic violence in the past but he tries to fix his indomitable temper by going more to church. In addition, he has had a mistress. You have the whole latino male profile: the guy has intercourse with his wife, then his mistress, beats his kids, goes to church and have a few tequilas in between (change tequila for wine and delete church going and you get the French).  He has to be the guy.

But by chance, Brenda’s investigation stumbles into an FBI protected agent involved with a drug lord. The protected agent was supposed to be the victim instead of the entire family. The author of the tragic mistake: pregnant Dina (latina), who did not hesitate to kill an entire family to take her man out of jail. When Brenda gets her to confess, Dina utters that she wanted to have her family! What wouldn’t one do in the name of family…

In the end, Lieutenant Provenza does his best to comfort Rivera, who at least is cleared. Family courts goes for the easy scapegoat in less dramatic matters – the male brute-, while the “closer” looks beyond cliches.  The law is always two steps behind society.

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Let's Get Honest! Absolutely Uncommon Analysis of Family & Conciliation Courts' Operations, Practices, & History

'A Different Kind of Attention Develops Sound Judgment' | 'Suppose I'm Right Here?' (See March 23 & 5, 2014). More Than 745 posts and 45 pages of Public-Interest Investigative Blogging On These Matters Since 2009.