You don’t know what parental alienation and parental alienation syndrom are? Take a look at what follows:
On December 19, on Camille’s birthday, I sent my girls two watches – one for Camille, one for Chloé- and a card. On Tuesday January 24, I received – in the very envelope I had used- the two watches – unwrapped- and my card with the following line on the lower right corner:
We want nothing from you except the return of our privacy, starting with the removal of your disgusting website.
What’s the intention of these words? To hurt, to rubb hate to my face. Touché.
This line is not signed. Camille? Chloé? Mom? A “we” wrote to me. At this stage, the alienating parent has won. The brainwashing has been completed. Mom does not need anymore to tell her victims their father is to be hated, for mom’s hate has been appropriated by the victims. At this stage, why would mom feel she is doing anything wrong, if she has ever? Two seemingly rational girls reflect back her own hate. The privacy my girls say they want back? Although they live in New York City, it is as if they were living in a bunker to me. I have no contact with them except through mom’s email, through mom’s phone, under mom’s control. But mom wants the removal of “my website,” which is the only thing that keeps her from evicting me in peace from the universe of the girls. The victims take side with the executioner, that’s the beauty of parental alienation. The request to remove my blog is a starting point without any end. In fact, I am deep fried in eternal hate: Mom’s.
Girls, I love you no matter what.
But this blog will go on. For a long time now, it ‘s not just been about you. It has been about preserving the privacy of other children like you with their dads; And to try to keep the irresponsible amateurs of Manhattan Family Court -the Sturms, the Octobres, the Spitzers, the Berrils – to give a free pass to parental alienation.
It is tough being public with efforts to raise awareness of parental alienation. I’m sure I’ve paid a price…
What keeps me “out there” is something a friend said. He once ran a supervised visitation center. He said that he had all kinds of criminals using the center in order to see their kids, and their kids loved these men and women and wanted to spend time with them no matter what crimes they had commited.
Bottom line, when alienated children want us to be part of their lives it won’t matter that we wrote a blog, a book, or spoke out against parental alienation. They’ll reach out to us as long as they know we still want to be part of their lives and love them unconditionally — no strings attached.
Hang in there…
Mike Jeffries
Author, A Family’s Heartbreak: A Parent’s Introduction to Parental Alienation
Thanks Mike, I appreciate it. Pierre
There is only thing that breaks my heart more than a father being deprived from seeing his children: a mother who instills hatred in her own kids.
Yeah, I’m with Mike Jeffries: hang in there….
I agree with Mike (I hope you’re keeping well Mike and thanks for your help with my (then) new radio show)
It can be extremely difficult being in the public eye, educating society on parental alienation and hostile aggressive parenting behaviours which typically occur during divorce or separation, especially when you’re a second wife like me.
The love for our Children is what keeps me out there; our Children have the right to the love, care and attention of both parents, period.
Keep up the good fight my friend,
Paulette MacDonald
Co-president, Canadian Equal Parenting Council
Advocate\Activist, Parental Alienation Awareness Organization
Here is a promise I made my step-children during our twenty nine months apart;
Love Is For Everyone!
(Inspired by a page from my step daughter’s Diary)
For my “Goobie Do” and “Monkey Brown” too!
My Love for you both I declare to be true.
For loving you both Is all I ever wanted to do.
And now, an ocean of lies, Keeps us apart.
But my love never wavers, You’re deep in my heart.
I pray one day soon, The courts will wake up.
Until that day comes, We must never give up.
With every beat of my heart, I’ll shout out your names.
And I’ll ask the courts, Are you completely Insane?
For you are not to blame For this alienation,
The courts have allowed to sweep through our nation.
I pray for you both, To be brave and strong.
And to know in your hearts, You have done nothing wrong.
For the day will come, When truth will prevail.
And the courts will know That they have failed.
And when that day comes You both shall see,
For I have faith in you and me.
And we will show the courts, That we were meant to be-
Forever and Always A “Happy” family.
And I will declare to the courts, And the whole world to see
That “Love is for everyone!” Especially you & me.
I will Always, Always Love you both Out Loud!
I am with you all the way..Don’t ever take this blog down..My husband and I are two affected with parental alienation with his two daughters he has not seen since they were 12 and 13..They are now 29 and twenty eight..He has had sickness and I tried to tell his youngest on face book but I never hear back..They simply ignore me..Well, it’s their prison..It will destroy their lives and make them have relationship problems with men all their lives or they will “USE” men the same way their mother used my husband…Their mother taught them to hate and disrespect him and she did nothing in the marriage but hate him in front of their daughters years before the split…They hate him to the extreme…It is so painful..They “Justify” their hate because he was poor and had to move them around and they wanted a home and he just wanted to support them..He had to move where their was work…They cared more about material things and a home then the suffering of a human being!!!!The courts gave her everything and left him with nothing after 16 years and NO HOME!!!! She kicked him out on the street as a bum..If she really loved him she would have taught them to love and RESPECT him and to follow him wherever he had to make a living and find work…Before the divorce he went out in a strong hurricane for two weeks to commercial fish to feed, clothe his kids and when he got back from sea, he asked her for a kiss all she said was “my God, you act like you’ve been gone two months!!” He said it truly crushed him..
His daughters fail to realize we won’t be on this earth forever and they need to make amends for the wrong and hurt they have caused… They are young now, having a good time, caught up in the world…They think when they are old and sick they won’t think anything about him, like he never existed, they think they won’t have a conscious about their hate, long after he’s gone/ Oh they will or they will be so hard hearted by their OWN PRIDE!! Their mother who still to this day carries his last name, but she hates him so much..I often wonder why she married him in the first place and he asked her that many times and she just said I don’t know..She USED him as a stepping stone…I will continue to comfort any persons affected by this tragedy of human proportions and educate myself.. Forgiveness is everything..You just allow yourself to move on with peace and hope one day for a true reunion and true repentance, remorse on their part ..If it never happens we have done all we could..Hatred is the cancer of all human spirits…I will stand beside my husband forever…The best to you..
I am going thru the very same thing. Each and every time I attempt visitation I am greeted with another motion in court. Once the judge has had enough of her she attempts to move the case to another which only strings it out even longer. It’s unfortunate but she with the deepest pockets wins.
Someday the children will be found and hopefully understand. The parents love them and were deprived all of those precious years. We only hope we can meet and share a life with our children someday. Never give up prayer and hope.
Tim Johnston Japan
I don’t know my dad now. I have seen him only for a few hours today and even though it was nice, it’s hard because Im not a little girl anymore, Im a woman now. I kind of feel like, what good is it now, I made it this far without him? I don’t know if I can ever feel a real bond with him now, but I want to. My mom broke that bond. Someone has to stop this from happening to children and parents. My life was ruined because of parental alienation. My mom still collects child support. We live in Suffolk County, NY. This system has to change. My poor father had to pay child support for 20 years to his children he was never allowed to see. My little sister has no desire to see him. She doesn’t even remember my dad. My step father raised us and he’s all my sister can remember.
Dads and moms, don’t ever give up.
I am willing to tell my story about PAS but it is still going on! Very Painfull !
Hi Billy,
PAS stories hurt big time. Whenever you feel like it…